it feels like my heart
is whispering “ouch”
over and over and over
and over again.
So maybe I should hold it
a little bit tighter
and guard it
a little bit more.
It’s like floating down an empty hallway with blank walls and a thousand possible doors
And with each one you choose, you discover a new color, a new feeling, a new view
You see something that will either arouse your curiosity, drawing you in further – or push you away.
And more likely than not, both of these will occur and you won’t know where to turn or which direction to take
And so you decide to either continue discovering or you withdraw, even though the exit isn’t always clear.
And everything that used to feel so safe and warm in your peaceful, happy little cocoon
Suddenly changes when this new stranger crosses your path, disrupting all your quiet and calm
And sometimes it feels as sudden and unexpected and as out of place as Dorothy’s house dropping down into the middle of Oz
Or as natural as two bodies entwined into the deliciousness of almost one
And you have no control over how things will go or what you feel or what direction it will all take
And suddenly your mind is swirling with questions and thoughts and feelings and things that you cannot control or understand and you may never find the answers to any of it
So you step back and frantically try to recreate the peace and the calm
But it’s impossible to go backwards
After all of the lines have been crossed
And you can’t undo it and you can’t go back
Once your heart has come undone.