The Age Factor

The first time I ever dated a considerably younger guy, I repeatedly asked myself “What in the hell are you doing?”

It’s not like I was new to dating younger guys. In fact my first boyfriend was younger than me, my ex-husband was 7 years younger and my most recent LTR was with a guy 12 years younger. It wasn’t exactly new to me. But then out of nowhere it seems, the 20 year olds started appearing. I’d been hit on by 20 year old guys before, but none of them were ever able to truly capture my interest. There’s nothing remotely appealing about “Heyy whats up babe?” or “How r u?”  If he can’t string a simple sentence together, you kind of already know the deal.

But then twitter happened and it opened up a whole new group of guys – of all ages – who were actually thoughtful and funny and intelligent. Then add tinder (no explanation needed there) and the flood gates opened.

That’s when I decided to rethink the whole age thing.

I started out with just simple conversations.  I’d often ask these younger guys why they were interested in older women? Their answers were always the same:  Girls their age demand too much. They get upset if you don’t text them 20x a day. They don’t give a guy his space. They need to know where you are every minute of the day. They’re too dramatic. She was only interested in money. She wanted a serious boyfriend. She wanted to get married.  She was insecure. She was extremely jealous. The list goes on. All huge turn offs to a guy of any age.

Which brought me to why they were drawn to older women: Older women are confident. We don’t need to know what you’re doing every second of the day. We don’t care about that girl who you were talking to at the bar. We’re too busy to text you every single day. We don’t care how much money you make. We are busy with our own lives and careers. We’re more open minded and experimental when it comes to sex. And we certainly are not looking to get married.

Maybe dating a 20 yr. old would be fun.  I decided why not.

One guy in particular made me change my mind. It all started with a few sweet words. Not only was he articulate but extremely intelligent. Two things I can’t resist (even though I tried). Instead of partying with his friends, he chose to spend time with me. He was emotionally mature and genuinely interesting- both extremely sexy- which made him irresistible.

One of my flaws is that I sometimes try to end things at the first sign of trouble. Even if the “trouble” doesn’t actually exist.  I’m like the Runaway Bride of dating. So after only a few months of amazing sex and great conversation, I told him I could never see him ever again.

WHO DOES THAT?

Me, apparently. Well, I used to. (But I’m getting better.) It’s easy to let your head overthink and complicate things, but sometimes you need to think with your heart, which is kind of the same as NOT thinking.

Then a friend told me “Just let the relationship run it’s natural course.” Words I sometimes forget but should definitely try to remember. It’s sometimes difficult to enjoy time with someone when you’re constantly thinking “This can’t last.”

Luckily, he wouldn’t let me end it, so we continued to see each other.

And each time I would start to overthink it, friends would weigh in with “Just have fun. Who cares how old he is?”

It’s our experiences and the people we meet and share time with who ultimately shape who we are and who we become. So I did my best not to overthink it and just enjoy it.

Here is what I discovered. Age really is just a number. Your brain doesn’t say “You cannot be attracted to this person because they’re not the *right* age.” It’s all about chemistry and connection. It’s probably true that a guy in his 20’s isn’t looking for a girlfriend and is more interested in just having sex.  But that’s often true about guys in their 30’s and 40’s, too. And it’s a common fact that women reach their sexual peak in their mid 30’s to 40’s. We think about, enjoy and want sex, too.

I had dismissed many guys simply because I thought they were too young.  But there’s a difference between someone’s age and  emotional maturity. And just because a guy is older doesn’t mean he’s emotionally mature either (I’ve been down that road before, too).

Age doesn’t determine chemistry. If you connect with someone who’s fun and interesting, why not just enjoy it?

It’s all about mutual respect and how you make each other feel. If he makes you feel sexy and beautiful, and he’s respectful and honest, where’s the harm in that?

It doesn’t mean it has to turn into anything serious. Having fun together does not always equal love. It’s not a promise for forever. (I admit that’s a beautiful and romantic notion, but it’s simply not realistic.) It’s just fun and enjoyable and one more life experience that makes you a more interesting person. I mean the world could END TOMORROW. Would you really say no to having fun and good sex if you thought you only had one more day to live? I THINK NOT.

Find a person who you connect with, who you feel comfortable with, who you respect and trust. That’s when the sex really becomes amazing. If those pieces are missing, then you’re probably just having mediocre sex.

And age has nothing to do with finding that connection. Connection has to do with chemistry. And you never know who will have chemistry with until you actually spend time with someone. You shouldn’t dismiss a person simply because of their age.

I don’t often meet guys who can capture my interest. So when I do, why would I dismiss him simply because of his age? It’s all about how he treats me, how he makes me feel and how we interact together. And if all those pieces click, then why not just take it for what it is and simply enjoy it?

 

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Perspective

The first time I ever saw Kate, I did a double take. She was the kind of beautiful that made every person stop and stare. She had shoulder length black hair that fell in soft waves over the tops of her shoulders and a flawless complexion. She was tall and thin and had the body of a runway model. I smiled at her and she smiled back at me. I envied her youthfulness. Even in my mid-20’s, I never looked like that. She had the kind of beauty you only see in photo-shopped photographs in a fashion magazine.

I imagined that she had her own apartment and was going to school part time. That she had fabulous friends and an equally fabulous boyfriend. I imagined her life as fun and carefree, without a care in the world.

So Kate. Not her real name of course, but the stunningly beautiful part is all true. Each time I would see her, which was always in passing, I caught her staring at me. I would always smile and say hello and she would politely smile back. The staring part seemed a bit odd to me, but I didn’t think much of it. A few months passed. She always looked beautiful but distant. The staring and quiet smiling continued.

A few weeks later, we bumped into each other again at work. I made small talk but she seemed to struggle even with that. Finally it was time to go home. As we were getting ready to leave, I turned around and there she was standing a few feet away, staring at me. I found it odd but she seemed sweet so again, I tried to make small talk. She asked about my girls and seemed genuinely interested in my life. She seemed touched that I was a single mom, struggling to juggle work and career and kids and a social life. After all those months, it was the first time we had ever had a real conversation.

Then out of the blue she said “You are so beautiful. I mean that. You really are so beautiful, inside and out.”

I was completely taken aback.

Here was this young, gorgeous model-esque girl telling me that I was beautiful. I really didn’t know what to say. I replied back “No, Kate, you are beautiful. But thank you so much.”

She didn’t dismiss me as old or faceless, as young people sometimes do. She admired me and looked up to me. I was completely touched.

She looked like she might cry. My natural instinct was to hug her and normally I would have. But we really didn’t know each other very well so I held back. She seemed so lost and sad.  She smiled at me and then, without a word, she turned and left.

One evening, when I was out with a group of mutual friends, I hesitantly asked “What’s the deal with Kate?” I wasn’t trying to pry, but something just seemed off about her.

That was when I found out that Kate was an alcoholic. She was living with her boyfriend who had been in and out of jail for heroin possession.  Some days she wouldn’t even show up for work. And when she did, she would often arrive looking like she hadn’t showered for days. Her boss tried countless times to help her. Instead of letting her go, she kept her on part-time. Kate would lie to people and say she had graduated from college, when the truth was she dropped out after only a few weeks.

Friends, family and co-workers all tried to help her. But yet she remained with the heroin addict and was struggling with alcohol.

My heart completely broke.  Here was this beautiful young girl, throwing away what should have been some of the best years of her life.

 

I’ve never struggled with an addiction, unless you count the high you get when you *think* you are in love with someone (note that *thinking* something does not always make it real), but I imagine it is one of the most difficult things to overcome.

Too often, we see someone whose life appears to be better than ours. It’s easy to think everyone else has it easier or has a more exciting life than we do. But the truth is our lives are exactly what we make of them, which has absolutely nothing to do with looks or money or appearance.

What we perceive to be true isn’t always. It’s easy to hide pain and sadness behind a smile or false exterior.

I may not be model thin or have flawless skin but I actually have a pretty great life. A beautiful home, two amazing little girls and a hundred other things I am grateful for every single day.

I don’t know what will become of Kate. That was the last time I ever saw her. I don’t know what events brought her to such a low point in her life, but I hope with all my heart she finds a way out.

What I do know is that not everyone is able to deal with the difficulties that life throws our way. I have been very fortunate in that I have been able to overcome most of life’s obstacles simply by finding the humor in most situations and by always keeping a positive outlook. But not everyone is able to do that.

Life is fair in that we all have our own share of hard times and problems and difficulties. The unfair part is that some people ultimately fall apart and are never able to put themselves back together again.

I hope with all my heart that Kate is not one of those people. I hope she can find a way to pull herself together and come out a stronger person. And if I ever do see her again, I’m definitely going to give her that hug.

No matter what someone’s life looks like on the outside, maybe we all need to take a closer look.

By Mai Ramai from abstract.desktopnexus.com

By Mai Ramai from abstract.desktopnexus.com

 

50 First Dates

After another horribly cold winter, I decided that once spring arrived I would force myself to start dating again. Ugh.

And while dating can be a lot of fun, it’s also a lot of work. Manicures and blow outs and coordinating schedules and what shoes to wear? Is this guy worth my most expensive perfume? And is this outfit too sexy, too slutty or both?

I admit I watch The Bachelor and The Bachelorette and even though it’s a complete drama-fest, it’s quite addictive. I mean even the men cry. Men crying and fighting over a girl they all met 5 minutes ago? Come on. Who wouldn’t want to watch that?

I always thought it would be fun to be on that show and have 20+ guys all vying for my attention. Since I’ll never have men fighting and crying over me on national television, I decided the next best thing would be to go out on as many dates as I could squeeze into one summer. After all, I’m single and my girls have been gone on vacations for most of the summer and I have really pretty hair (okay that’s not really a reason). But why not?

So 50 dates? I doubt I’ll have that many, but I figured I would document my experiences as I go along, just for fun. (And imagine a camera crew is following me around and filming my every move. Translation: No one night stands allowed because then everyone will know and think I’m a slut, which of course I’m not.)

Not all of the guys I’ve met so far are worth mentioning and some dates have bored me to tears, but here are a few so far.

(Oh, I should mention I sometimes give them nicknames because A. it’s fun and makes them easier to remember and B. to protect their true identities, DUH.)

1. Robert Downey Jr. I swear this guy could have been RDJ’s twin brother. Although he was nice and very handsome, I wasn’t really feeling the sparks but he looked so much like Robert Downey Jr, I had to at least mention it.

2. Cute Tattoo Guy: So adorable in all of his photos (I met him on tinder). After speaking on the phone, I was 99% sure we’d have absolutely nothing in common, but I still wanted to meet him anyway because I’m a complete sucker for a cute face. When we met, one of his eyebrows was partially shaven off and I spent the entire time trying to figure out how anyone could do that. I really wanted to say “Hey, so why is your eyebrow half shaven off?” but I thought that might be rude and everyone knows how terribly polite I am, so of course I tried not to stare and said nothing.

3. If you’ve never seen Arthur (the original one with Dudley Moore), go on Netflix right now and watch it. It’s a must see. Guy#3 was just like Arthur: funny, sweet, a great dresser and always laughing and smiling. The one thing I never do is ask a guy what he does. If he volunteers the information, great but I never ask because to me, age and income are irrelevant. I’m more interested in his personality and how he treats me. So I was quite surprised when he picked me up in his limo (yes, he flipping owns a limousine) and gave me the key to his loft apartment overlooking the Inner Harbor for me to stay (ALONE) overnight. (Not where he lives, but a private apartment he keeps for guests.) We took the limo to dinner, followed by a night of drinking in the limo and driving bar to bar, all over the Inner Harbor. All I could think about was Dudley Moore in Arthur. Because he was so much fun, this guy has a very good chance of getting a second date (but that’s none of your business so please don’t ask because I’m not telling).

4. Mr. Perfect:  This man made me feel like a princess the entire night. He took me to one of the most expensive restaurants in Baltimore and put me up in a 4 star hotel for the night because he knew we would be drinking (no, he did NOT spend the night). When I arrived at the restaurant, the valet took my car and later, he even arranged for them to drive it back to the hotel for me. He ordered 3 bottles of the most expensive wine (all different so we could sample them) and we had a beautiful meal. After dinner, he drove me back to the hotel and he went home. (What a huge waste of a great hotel room. Ugh, again.) He was a complete gentleman. Every girl should have at least one date like this one where you can get ready in a beautiful hotel room and not have to worry about one thing the entire night. Amazing, to say the least.

5. Justin Timberlake. (Okay, he looks nothing like JT but he was super hot.) While having dinner with friends, we had the most delicious waiter. He was so nice that after flirting with him all night, I decided to leave my phone number on the back of the receipt (giving new meaning to ‘nice tip’). I’ve never done that before and I really didn’t think he’d call, but the next day he sent me a very nice text and we arranged a date. This is all I am willing to say about this one, except that I would highly recommend leaving your number with a cute guy (waiter or otherwise) because you just never know.

The only real problem with all of these first dates (besides having to pick out a cute outfit every night) is what happens if I meet someone I really like? [Or maybe I already met someone I really like and maybe he broke my heart and maybe this is my new plan to get over him. Maybe.] I haven’t really thought about that but most guys get bored easily. Whatever happens, happens.

Ideally, I’ll meet one fabulous guy and we’ll have 50 fun dates together but let’s not get too crazy. For now, this is a fun experiment and a great way to learn about men and maybe make some new friends along the way.

So today is Friday. Guess what? I have another date tonight, tomorrow night and another on Sunday.

And frankly, I’m exhausted already.

Photo courtesy of www.lovepanky.com

 

 

Broken Hearts

I remember the first time I ever had my heart broken. Jay was tall, incredibly handsome and a perfect gentleman. He sent me roses every single month for the entire year we were together. He bought me my first bottle of expensive perfume (a scent I still love and wear). He sent me cards and wrote me beautiful love notes. I rarely save anything from old loves, but I still have a few cards he sent me. In one, he wrote “I love you, I want you, I need you.”  It’s still one of the most romantic things a man has ever given me. We were both barely 18. It’s crazy to think that a guy that young could be that thoughtful and romantic. But he was.

It was an idyllic first love. He completely adored me and we had an amazing summer together. But like most first loves, it came to an end.  The week before Christmas, he came to my house to drop off my gift. And as he stood in the doorway, somehow I knew he had cheated on me the weekend before. I’m not sure how girls know these things but sometimes you can just feel them in your bones. He admitted he had slept with someone else and I fell apart. I cried for weeks. I didn’t think I would ever get over him.

But I did.

But I can’t listen to The Payola’s You’re the Only Love without remembering that summer.

There are only two other times I ever felt that kind of hurt. And both occurred in more recent years.

The most memorable one and the most painful by far was three summers ago. I’ve written about it here, so I won’t rehash it all again. But instead of crying in bed for weeks (okay, I may have done that, too) I was more like Diane Keaton’s character in Something’s Gotta Give, sitting at my laptop and writing it all out. Writing and crying. I literally wrote – and cried –  for weeks, maybe months. I was completely inconsolable. I remember feeling a genuine physical ache that literally lasted for months. It felt like the pain would never go away.

But eventually, it did.

It’s impossible to go through life without experiencing loss. At some point, we all have our hearts broken. And no matter how many times it happens, it’s one of the few things in life that never seems to get any easier.

It always fucking hurts.

And it’s not something you can prevent although some people think you can control it. A man once told me he would never fall in love with anyone ever again, after having his heart broken by someone else. Then he fell in love with me. And I didn’t mean to hurt him (no one ever plans these things) but after a few years, I decided I needed to end it. The relationship had taken a toll on me, both physically and emotionally, and uncertainty in any relationship can be just as damaging as infidelity. Sometimes it feels like if we end things first, that will make it easier or less painful. But the truth is if you still care about the person at all, it’s never an easy thing to do. And even though I still cared about him deeply, I knew it needed to end.

I spent months questioning my decision. Looking back, I know it was for the best, but at the time, I was too immersed in mixed emotions to see it.  It’s almost impossible to separate logic from love when you are completely caught up in the middle of it.

Falling in – and out – of love is completely uncontrollable. You can’t stop your heart from feeling something it feels.  And you can’t make someone feel something if they don’t. That’s the tragic beauty of love.

But what if both people still care? What if we held onto that person, instead of letting go and decided to work it out before throwing it all away? That only works if both people want it badly enough and are committed to each other.

Is it easier to walk away and start over fresh with someone new? Or do you stay and try to lovingly mend all of the broken pieces?

All the art of living lies in a fine mingling

of letting go and holding onHenry Ellis

Love is the most amazing feeling in the world. So it amazes me how some people are so quick to throw it away.  Once a man has captured my heart, I am completely devoted to him. I have lived long enough to know that finding love is rare and I don’t think you should ever throw it away.

Everything could be falling apart around you, but if you have someone who loves you, somehow it makes everything else seem better. Having that one special person on your side can make all the difference. And when they suddenly disappear from your life, it can feel like your entire world has come to an end.

But it doesn’t.

 

Heart break is inevitable. You can’t stop it from happening if it wasn’t meant to be. And you can’t put all of the pieces back together after everything has fallen apart. And it’s pointless to hold onto to something when the other person has already let go.

Life doesn’t end just because love sometimes does.

That’s when letting go gracefully seems to be the only option.

And no matter how much it hurts when you are going through it, we all heal and we all move past it and we all survive. But even better than that is that we always find love again.

Everyone survives a broken heart.  But it still hurts like hell.

After my divorce, I said I would never marry ever again. But the truth is I still believe in true love. I still believe in the fairy tale. I still want to lie in bed with someone at night and kiss and hold hands and make love and fall asleep together.  I want to fall in love with every part of his mixed up soul. And I’ll always believe that the only reason we were placed on this earth is to love and to be loved.

I will never stop believing that love is the most amazing thing in this world.

But just to be safe, I think I might sit this next game out.  ♥

Image from Pinterest.

Image from Pinterest.

 

 

 

Undone

It’s like floating down an empty hallway with blank walls and a thousand possible doors

And with each one you choose, you discover a new color, a new feeling, a new view

You see something that will either arouse your curiosity, drawing you in further – or push you away.

And more likely than not, both of these will occur and you won’t know where to turn or which direction to take

And so you decide to either continue discovering or you withdraw, even though the exit isn’t always clear.

 

And everything that used to feel so safe and warm in your peaceful, happy little cocoon

Suddenly changes when this new stranger crosses your path, disrupting all your quiet and calm

And sometimes it feels as sudden and unexpected and as out of place as Dorothy’s house dropping down into the middle of Oz

Or as natural as two bodies entwined into the deliciousness of almost one

And you have no control over how things will go or what you feel or what direction it will all take

And suddenly your mind is swirling with questions and thoughts and feelings and things that you cannot control or understand and you may never find the answers to any of it

 

So you step back and frantically try to recreate the peace and the calm

But it’s impossible to go backwards

After all of the lines have been crossed

And you can’t undo it and you can’t go back

Once your heart has come undone.

 

Beautiful

Marc_Jacobs

I once lived in a one bedroom basement apartment with my best friend. We had a small kitchen table without chairs and two mattresses on the floor, and that was pretty much it. Our living room was completely empty. We had nothing except a few dishes in the kitchen cabinets and a closet over-flowing with all of our clothes, bags and shoes. I’m not sure how we survived with so little, yet I would drop $50 on a half ounce jar of eye cream without thinking twice. A completely broke 20 year old girl buying anti-wrinkle cream. I’m certain I already had flawless skin, like most 20-something girls do, but I still spent a chunk of my paycheck on beauty products vs. food.

For a girl who grew up reading Seventeen magazine, the pages filled with perfect bodies and pretty smiles, not surprising at all.

And I am sure I wasn’t the only one.

And isn’t that how most girls think? We grow up believing that beauty is vitally important to our being. It defines us somehow. Life will be better/happier/easier/more fulfilling, more something, if you are prettier.

And you don’t have to accept it or agree with it. But that’s just the way it is. And that won’t ever change. We will never live in a world where beauty is not revered or desired. Not ever. So what choice do we have but to accept and embrace it?

Audrey Hepburn said “Happy girls are the prettiest girls.” Who coincidentally was one of the most perfectly beautiful women to have ever lived.

We are bombarded by messages telling us that beauty comes from within, and that being a good person is beautiful, and that true beauty is blah blah blah.  But meanwhile, every man wants a Kate Upton. It’s all very confusing to a 12 year old girl, still learning about the world and trying to figure out where she fits in all of this.

And how do you teach that same 12 year old girl that inner beauty is more important than outer? Not an easy task.

And even with degrees in science and education on top of years spent trying to complete a Masters degree, I know that no amount of education will ever change the fact that I still want to be pretty, too. Because in this world, pretty is what everyone wants. Men want a beautiful woman on their arm (it’s a status symbol) and the prettiest girls find the most desirable mates. And any person- male or female- would be lying if they said they did not want to be more attractive. What person ever says “I want to be less attractive.” You can’t find that person because s/he simply does not exist. Because beauty is valued in our society. Period. Men want beautiful. And women completely fall into the beauty trap every single day.

It’s all a very ugly thing, when you really start to think about it.

An ex once told me “I would rather date a girl with a pretty face than one with a good body. Her face is the most important part.”

He’s not alone. Men can’t help it. They’re attracted to looks and the physical. And although women are attracted to good looks, too, it’s a fact that men rate a woman’s looks as the most important thing about her.

Men rate a woman’s looks as the most important thing about her. Worth stating twice, because wow. Wow and I think that explains quite a lot.

In a study done by Ask Men, men rated facial attractiveness as the #1 most desirable trait in a woman.   Whereas, women rated intelligence, passion and a sense of humor in the top 5 qualities most desired in a man.  And the importance of a mans looks to a woman was much lower at #9.

It’s no great mystery why women place such importance on how they look. It’s a competitive world out there and men are always searching for the next pretty face. Sure you’re pretty, but she’s really beautiful. And as beautiful as she is, that other girl is stunning. And men don’t think twice about leaving a beautiful woman for someone they consider to be more beautiful. It happens every day. So is it any wonder why women are continually trying to improve their looks?

I know a woman (in fact, an entire group of women) who have all spent thousands of dollars on surgery and injections trying to achieve “it”.  One husband even commented to me that his wife no longer looks recognizable. Make that his ex-wife. They are now divorced so maybe that says something about that. I don’t know. And admittedly, if I had the means, I too might consider doing some of the same. But I don’t foresee becoming rich anytime soon, so I guess I will never find out.

In the meantime, the perfect blow out and a pedicure still make me feel pretty. I feel sexy in a great pair of jeans. And all that confidence translates into feeling attractive, which makes me feel good. So where is the wrong in that?

The problem is that there will always be someone better looking. And along with that comes the natural worry that he might leave you for someone “better.” Even if she is not actually “better” at all. My best friend- one of the most stunningly beautiful and smartest women I know- discovered her husband was cheating on her. And I’m not suggesting that men cheat only because they found someone more attractive. But the fact is men are always looking. Even if they never act upon it. And cheating is extremely common. So maybe it’s not such an irrational thing to worry about after all.

Maybe that’s just the way it is.

Feeling beautiful, looking beautiful and actually being beautiful are all very different things.

And genuine beauty has nothing to do with what you see in a magazine.

But yet, that will never change the fact that men will continue to seek exactly that physical, outward type of beauty. And therefore, women will continually strive to achieve it.

 

In the end, each person should do what they want. Do whatever you need to do to feel pretty and sexy and amazing and happy and beautiful.

And hopefully, one day you will meet someone so amazing in every sense of the word, that they will completely redefine your own perception of what makes a person beautiful. Suddenly, it’s not just about how they look, but it becomes about the way they smile, the words they say, the way they look at you and the way they make you feel. The same guy or girl that you once viewed as attractive, now defines beauty in every single sense of the word. And all you’ll be able to see is a person you can’t possibly imagine being without. Ultimately, that is what makes someone perfectly beautiful, above and beyond anyone else. And that is what I am going to teach my daughters.

 

Link: http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-proven-traits-men-desire-in-women.html

Photo taken from catsandcouture.blogspot.com

Photo taken from catsandcouture.blogspot.com

 

Little Girls

One daughter falls asleep each night with a book in her hands, quietly observing life from the edge.

While the other prefers to explore the world first hand without question or fear of consequence or boundaries.

Wildly different, yet equally beautiful.

I often wonder which will have the most fulfilling life.

Most likely, both.

 One runs and sings and laughs without care. She is the devil on your shoulder. She has no inhibitions. She once said, “Mommy, I don’t think I have a conscience.”  And of course I laughed. She simply sparkles and delights.

The other is quiet and submissive. She is thoughtful and calm. Until she is not. She can be the butterfly that lands on your hand. And in the next moment, a quiet storm.

And from all outward appearances, they would seem to be the same. They both have soft brown hair, perfect smiles and eyes filled with wonder.

But one giggles shyly when she laughs, while the other lights up like a hundred fireworks.

A man I once loved told me “Your girls are everything that you are.”

I can’t imagine a more beautiful thing to say to a mother. Because even on my worst days, when I don’t like myself very much, I still look at them in amazement.

Because they will both always be my two favorite people.

My heart.

Fall

Her skin smells like summer and his hair smells like delicious everything.

And she’ll keep saying no until his eyes and his hands and his body beg hers to say yes.

A million times over and over and over again.

Yes.

Because you make me want to fall and whisper everything I’m too afraid to think or feel.

And it’s all like a dream.

Like a beautiful illusion, a fantasy my mind cannot take hold of.

You make me fall.

You.

therockstarsofromance.com

therockstarsofromance.com

 

 

Heels

She loves to wear heels

But she prefers to walk barefoot with him in the sand

Holding his hand.

She loves to wear heels

But she happily tosses them to the floor

As she climbs into his bed

And wraps herself around him

Her head on his chest

So she can hear his heart beating

As the rest of the world fades away

And their world is just waking up.

 

Dreamy bedroom via Honeypie Living

Dreamy bedroom via Honeypie Living

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And she’ll toss them on the floor next to your bed….